Or at least the bottom bun of my cheeseburger was at lunch. I tossed it out my car window at the assorted birdies, who were thrilled at the carb influx.
I weighed in at 375 this morning. I've been that weight before but I think it was a bad weigh-in, as I jumped up to 383 the next morning. Talk about a shock. I doubt I could put on 6 pounds in a single day on mushy foods. So, right, I'm doing well.
I'm particularly proud that I'm finally combating emotional eating. Things haven't been happy around my homestead, with us being severely in debt and my husband not really speaking to me (no, I don't really know why, but I have theories.) With all of this going around I've been feeling some terrible anxiety, but I've been dealing OK this week with it all. I'm even feeling some sort of restriction occasionally, which I think is stress-induced, but nevertheless is very helpful when you don't want to be overeating.
TGIF, you guys. T to the G to the fuckin' IF.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Whee?
I couldn't think of a title for this post, just so you know. Hence the lameness.
So, this weekend was pretty shitty. It was nice to have time off but we have no money and my husband's acting kinda funny lately, so no fun was had by anyone at all. We were supposed to have a golfing party at a local course, and even that got canceled. Pffft.
I did, however, get back into cooking. It's not my favorite activity by any means, but I have learned that the strangely-portioned outer world is not band friendly. Like, even a little bit. So it's a good idea to make your own stuff. I started out by whipping up a batch of cottage cheese pancakes, per Eggface's instructions. (Her web site is fanTAStic. Recipes galore and lots of "food porn." Hee hee.) They turned out pretty well, although my husband was not thrilled. I made a batch with banana pudding mix and strawberry preserves. Pretty good, although I could not find sugar-free versions of this stuff at Fresh and Easy.
On Sunday I made a spinach frittata, courtesy of the Knorr's spinach soup mix packet. I used six eggs instead of eight to conserve resources. It was pretty good, although not quite as fluffy as some frittatas I've had. I blame the two eggs' absence. When it was done it looked a bit like spinach souffle, and strangely, it seemed like the spinach and seasonings floated to the top, leaving an eggy bottom. Is that possible? No clue. When I got myself a slice of frittata I topped it with some jarred Prego sauce. It was tasty stuff.
I'm looking forward to more kitchen adventures. I think it makes more sense for a bandster to make most of their own food than to rely on pre-made stuff.
So, this weekend was pretty shitty. It was nice to have time off but we have no money and my husband's acting kinda funny lately, so no fun was had by anyone at all. We were supposed to have a golfing party at a local course, and even that got canceled. Pffft.
I did, however, get back into cooking. It's not my favorite activity by any means, but I have learned that the strangely-portioned outer world is not band friendly. Like, even a little bit. So it's a good idea to make your own stuff. I started out by whipping up a batch of cottage cheese pancakes, per Eggface's instructions. (Her web site is fanTAStic. Recipes galore and lots of "food porn." Hee hee.) They turned out pretty well, although my husband was not thrilled. I made a batch with banana pudding mix and strawberry preserves. Pretty good, although I could not find sugar-free versions of this stuff at Fresh and Easy.
On Sunday I made a spinach frittata, courtesy of the Knorr's spinach soup mix packet. I used six eggs instead of eight to conserve resources. It was pretty good, although not quite as fluffy as some frittatas I've had. I blame the two eggs' absence. When it was done it looked a bit like spinach souffle, and strangely, it seemed like the spinach and seasonings floated to the top, leaving an eggy bottom. Is that possible? No clue. When I got myself a slice of frittata I topped it with some jarred Prego sauce. It was tasty stuff.
I'm looking forward to more kitchen adventures. I think it makes more sense for a bandster to make most of their own food than to rely on pre-made stuff.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Your Cheatin' Stomach, Part 2
Okay, a few points of note for those who either want the band or have it already:
1. This shit ain't easy.
2. Congrats on the band! Now here are all your old bad eating habits.
Yes, those habits don't go away. I felt like all of my bad, evil, no-good habits were melted away when I walked out of the surgery center (I was kinda in a lot of pain at the time and thinking I'd never want to eat again), but they followed me home.
The worst habit I have is emotional eating. I like to treat myself to something nice as compensation for the shitty things that happen in life. Life isn't fair, so have a cookie. I didn't realize how big of a crutch this was until lately.
Yesterday: So, we're totally poor right now. Completely without money. The bank account's overdrawn. We're moving to sell my car this weekend to make a quick $2k to pay some delinquent bills. (Things are so bad we almost had the power and water shut off. Our cable has been shut off at this point, and we've been a week without any kind of television at all, even local stations. No internet, either.) I take my car to get some gas (as the tank was nearly as empty as my bank account) and a quick car wash to prettify it for a potential buyer. This was a depressing act, truly, as I love my car and the freedom it affords. Yes, we will save $300 per month in gas and insurance costs. Yes, it's good for air quality to carpool places with the Husband. But c'mon, it's a huge dent in your freedom to have to wait after work for your ride to show up, be it the Husband or a bus.
After taking my car through the car wash, I could feel the stress and sadness build up. I stopped at Taco Bell next door and ordered a bean burrito and a bottle of water. I figured that the protein in the burrito would be "good" for me. Well, I inhaled half the burrito in about a minute and had to bodily remove the rest of it from my presence before I gobbled up the rest. Faced with increasing sadness and now no food pacifer, I started to cry. And wail. And sob my damn fool heart out. Alllll the way home.
Lesson learned? Emotional eating is still a huge problem. It will continue to be a problem. I will have to find alternate coping mechanisms, or be a huge teary mess all the time.
1. This shit ain't easy.
2. Congrats on the band! Now here are all your old bad eating habits.
Yes, those habits don't go away. I felt like all of my bad, evil, no-good habits were melted away when I walked out of the surgery center (I was kinda in a lot of pain at the time and thinking I'd never want to eat again), but they followed me home.
The worst habit I have is emotional eating. I like to treat myself to something nice as compensation for the shitty things that happen in life. Life isn't fair, so have a cookie. I didn't realize how big of a crutch this was until lately.
Yesterday: So, we're totally poor right now. Completely without money. The bank account's overdrawn. We're moving to sell my car this weekend to make a quick $2k to pay some delinquent bills. (Things are so bad we almost had the power and water shut off. Our cable has been shut off at this point, and we've been a week without any kind of television at all, even local stations. No internet, either.) I take my car to get some gas (as the tank was nearly as empty as my bank account) and a quick car wash to prettify it for a potential buyer. This was a depressing act, truly, as I love my car and the freedom it affords. Yes, we will save $300 per month in gas and insurance costs. Yes, it's good for air quality to carpool places with the Husband. But c'mon, it's a huge dent in your freedom to have to wait after work for your ride to show up, be it the Husband or a bus.
After taking my car through the car wash, I could feel the stress and sadness build up. I stopped at Taco Bell next door and ordered a bean burrito and a bottle of water. I figured that the protein in the burrito would be "good" for me. Well, I inhaled half the burrito in about a minute and had to bodily remove the rest of it from my presence before I gobbled up the rest. Faced with increasing sadness and now no food pacifer, I started to cry. And wail. And sob my damn fool heart out. Alllll the way home.
Lesson learned? Emotional eating is still a huge problem. It will continue to be a problem. I will have to find alternate coping mechanisms, or be a huge teary mess all the time.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Your Cheatin'... Stomach?
Yesterday I ate stuff I'm not supposed to.
The day before that I ate stuff I'm not supposed to.
The good news is, I no longer want those things. The short-term gratification was very short-term, as I immediately felt awful and wondered just what the hell I'd done to myself.
The bad news is it has put a little stop in my weight loss. I'm not too upset about that as I can always rebound back. I'm still in my third week, I'm going to make mistakes. I can get back on the wagon before it rounds the corner.
Was I right to cheat on my mooshy foods diet? Not really. Do I feel bad about it? Only kinda. I have learned from the experience and I am betting that I will look back on these little cheats as object lessons. The next time I want something really bad I will think twice about it. Do I want to have it now and feel yucky later, or should I just eat what I'm supposed to now and feel great about it later?
Right, and you lot better not post comments about how bad I've been to cheat. Everyone cheats on their diets, banded or not, so I don't want any righteous indignation posts. If you haven't cheated yet, good for you. It doesn't mean that you will never cheat.
In other news, THE STAPLES ARE GONE. Thank heavens. They itched terribly. They put some steri-strips on, which fell off immediately. These things are useful why?? There is one left on one incision. Wherps.
The day before that I ate stuff I'm not supposed to.
The good news is, I no longer want those things. The short-term gratification was very short-term, as I immediately felt awful and wondered just what the hell I'd done to myself.
The bad news is it has put a little stop in my weight loss. I'm not too upset about that as I can always rebound back. I'm still in my third week, I'm going to make mistakes. I can get back on the wagon before it rounds the corner.
Was I right to cheat on my mooshy foods diet? Not really. Do I feel bad about it? Only kinda. I have learned from the experience and I am betting that I will look back on these little cheats as object lessons. The next time I want something really bad I will think twice about it. Do I want to have it now and feel yucky later, or should I just eat what I'm supposed to now and feel great about it later?
Right, and you lot better not post comments about how bad I've been to cheat. Everyone cheats on their diets, banded or not, so I don't want any righteous indignation posts. If you haven't cheated yet, good for you. It doesn't mean that you will never cheat.
In other news, THE STAPLES ARE GONE. Thank heavens. They itched terribly. They put some steri-strips on, which fell off immediately. These things are useful why?? There is one left on one incision. Wherps.
Friday, April 11, 2008
Whey More Protein
Went to GNC last night. GNC and I have a combative relationship. Whenever I've been in there before I get looks like, "WTF are you doing here? You're not a body-builder, obviously." Talking to the staff at GNC has previously been a total waste of time, as they try to sell me huge vats of stuff I don't need and/or can't afford. I was pleasantly surprised at the South Phoenix location, however. I will be back. I even have a Gold Card now.
I came in wanting some whey protein powder to add to food. I wanted one that was as unflavored as possible, because I need to add it to things like eggs, cottage cheese, soups, etc. I picked up something unflavored, but it said it was a drink only. Hmm. I asked the fellow at the desk and he brought up a canister of Any Whey, a protein powder made specifically for the purpose of adding protein to foods. Eureka!! It was a tad expensive ($26 for a little over a pound.... yeesh) but I think it's for the best.
I also bought two Isopure Zero Carb bottled drinks. These suckers are 20 oz. of artificially sweetened liquid with a whopping 40 grams of protein in each. Dang, thas a lotta protein. I'm drinking the Blue Raspberry flavor right now, and it's verrrrryyyyyy sweet. It's not unpleasant, however, and I think I prefer this to chugging some icky chocolate protein shake. These are expensive bottles, however ($4!!) so I won't be buying too many of them. Yikes.
I hope all this protein will keep my hair from falling out. I want my hair to stay put.
I came in wanting some whey protein powder to add to food. I wanted one that was as unflavored as possible, because I need to add it to things like eggs, cottage cheese, soups, etc. I picked up something unflavored, but it said it was a drink only. Hmm. I asked the fellow at the desk and he brought up a canister of Any Whey, a protein powder made specifically for the purpose of adding protein to foods. Eureka!! It was a tad expensive ($26 for a little over a pound.... yeesh) but I think it's for the best.
I also bought two Isopure Zero Carb bottled drinks. These suckers are 20 oz. of artificially sweetened liquid with a whopping 40 grams of protein in each. Dang, thas a lotta protein. I'm drinking the Blue Raspberry flavor right now, and it's verrrrryyyyyy sweet. It's not unpleasant, however, and I think I prefer this to chugging some icky chocolate protein shake. These are expensive bottles, however ($4!!) so I won't be buying too many of them. Yikes.
I hope all this protein will keep my hair from falling out. I want my hair to stay put.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
2 Week Bandiversary!
Whee, two weeks since the surgery! I'm not experiencing any pain and I'm not dying of extreme hunger.
I'm starting to regain control over my eating. I simply can't stop at fast food places by myself right now. That will probably change, but for now, I must police myself.
My post-op appointment is on the 15th. Hope I get some good news! (And they take out the staples. They are itchy itchy itchy. Gaaah.)
I'm starting to regain control over my eating. I simply can't stop at fast food places by myself right now. That will probably change, but for now, I must police myself.
My post-op appointment is on the 15th. Hope I get some good news! (And they take out the staples. They are itchy itchy itchy. Gaaah.)
Monday, April 7, 2008
Yeeeuuuuccckkkkkk
Okay, I kinda need to get ahold of myself.
I can feel myself headed toward some pretty poor habits. The past couple of days I've had some convenience/restaurant foods, and I think as a result I'm eating more. There's just something still so odd about ordering something and not finishing it.
Today in point, I stopped by Taco Bell for mushyfood. I had some cheesy potatoes and their pintos and cheese. I ate all of the potatoes and most of the pintos (although the portions aren't huge for either, they are probably slightly more than I should be eating!) and I felt rather ill afterwards. First, the pintos are nothing but a sodium BOMB. I have never had anything so salty in my whole life. It was really disgusting. The potatoes were okay, but probably didn't have a whole lot in it that I should be eating.
For dinner tonight I heated up some frozen spinach souffle. It's pretty good stuff, but again, I realize that it has a whole lotta sodium. I ended up eating a little more than half of it (!!!!!!) and put aside a small portion for lunch. This is not good.
I need to take a step back and get into the right foodstuffs. I think tomorrow I may ply myself with a thermos filled with herbal tea and all protein shakes. It will be a bit of a detox from my (slight) overindulgences.
That's what's tricky about the (lap) band: there's still a lot of room to sabotage your weight loss.
I can feel myself headed toward some pretty poor habits. The past couple of days I've had some convenience/restaurant foods, and I think as a result I'm eating more. There's just something still so odd about ordering something and not finishing it.
Today in point, I stopped by Taco Bell for mushyfood. I had some cheesy potatoes and their pintos and cheese. I ate all of the potatoes and most of the pintos (although the portions aren't huge for either, they are probably slightly more than I should be eating!) and I felt rather ill afterwards. First, the pintos are nothing but a sodium BOMB. I have never had anything so salty in my whole life. It was really disgusting. The potatoes were okay, but probably didn't have a whole lot in it that I should be eating.
For dinner tonight I heated up some frozen spinach souffle. It's pretty good stuff, but again, I realize that it has a whole lotta sodium. I ended up eating a little more than half of it (!!!!!!) and put aside a small portion for lunch. This is not good.
I need to take a step back and get into the right foodstuffs. I think tomorrow I may ply myself with a thermos filled with herbal tea and all protein shakes. It will be a bit of a detox from my (slight) overindulgences.
That's what's tricky about the (lap) band: there's still a lot of room to sabotage your weight loss.
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